What Would Your Magic Potion Do?

As I was walking home a couple weeks ago, a small voice hailed me.
“Want to buy a magic potion?” The speaker was a neighbor from up the street, a four-year old boy with dark straight hair, sitting with his Mom on the front steps of their house.
A box with three small bottles lay across his mother’s lap. She smiled at me and said, “He’s selling homemade magic potions.” She ruffled his hair, adding, “But you don’t really want to drink them of course!”
I nodded, and picked out a bottle and admired the vibrant purple liquid inside. “Tell me what this one does?” I asked the boy.

“That one digs a deep hole in the ground that fills up with purple water,” he explained carefully, then ducked his head and turned back toward his mother.
“Which is the one that makes you fly like a bird?” his Mom prompted.
“This one.” he scooped another bottle from the box with both hands and handed it to me. I put the purple one back and held up the second bottle. This bottle’s contents, a white translucent liquid with small white floating specks, didn’t grab me, much as I liked the idea of flying. I put it back.
“What about the last potion,” I asked, reaching for the third bottle, “What are its magic powers?” The liquid inside was a murky greenish brown.

“That one causes explosions.” the boy said, leaning forward, his eyes on the bottle, “I don’t know why but it makes everything it touches just explode.”
I hastily put that bottle back in the box. He picked it up and shook it gently as if to experiment with exploding something. I noticed a splintery stick of wood left over from a building project lying beside the bottles in the box.
“That’s for sale too,” he told me, “wood is very useful.”
“You need to let her know what they all cost,” his mother said as he picked up the stick of wood and started demonstrating its usefulness by banging it on the stairway’s metal railing. “Remember what I paid you for my potion?”
“A quarter.” he said, turning back to me as he fingered the wood, “You can buy the stick of wood for a quarter too. Soon I’ll have a whole dollar.”
“Are you saving up for something?” I said, searching my pockets for coins.
“Yes. Something special. But I don’t know what it is yet.” He added candidly.

I laughed and gave him two quarters. “Well, I will contribute fifty cents to your dream. I’ll buy one magic purple potion and the stick of wood.”
He took the quarters and began clinking them together in his hand. I gathered my prizes from the box.
“What do you say?” his Mom said, touching his shoulder to get his attention.
“Thank you.” he said automatically, his focus still on the quarters in his hand.

I walked home, considering why I had chosen the deep hole in the ground filled with purple water and not the potion that could make me fly. Partly because of the color, I decided, but I also liked the idea of a magic purple well, like a well of dreams or memories I could draw upon in my writing. I thought about the little boy and imagined how it might feel again to believe one could create a magic potion.

So my question for you is, if you could make a magic potion, what would your potion be like, and what would it do? Feel free to respond, I’m really curious!

Recipe for Friendship

Image

 

One of my most vivid memories of my friend, Dotz, is of her calling my name at the Farmer’s Market on a hot summer day in Takoma Park. Dotz and I had met a few times before that day, once at the local yoga center, and again, unexpectedly, in Connecticut at a weekend poetry workshop where we took a couple of long walks together and discussed the workshop. 

But that bright day at the farmer’s market stays with me. I didn’t recognize the voice calling my name at first and then I saw Dotz, loaded down with bags, smiling at me and waving.
“I’ve been thinking about you,” she said in her cheerful way, putting a couple bags down to give me a hug, “I’m taking a personal growth class in the fall which I think you would like.”
When I expressed interest, she invited me to walk back to her house a few blocks away to show me the brochure. I remember feeling excited that she had thought of me even though we didn’t know each other that well. I had the sense of a door opening between us, that I was being invited to step forward into the new space of a possible friendship. 

That was in 2003. Over the years our friendship has gone through a testing and deepening process as friendships must, as we’ve helped each other navigate through our lives.
We did take that personal growth class together, and then afterward, started doing a weekly phone check-in session with each other that continued for six years. In order to do this and be friends in daily life, we worked out rules of confidentiality and clear boundaries.  So besides helping each other through tricky experiences of depression, insomnia, a relationship breakup and a big move, we also did things like watching a tv series together, going appliance shopping, and cooking dinner at each other’s houses.

For both of us, our friendship has taught us to trust and believe in ourselves and celebrate our places in the world. Dotz says, ”Seeing and holding our friend’s strengths with more clarity than she could see them, allowed each of us to believe that those strengths were real and then gradually we began to “have” them and claim them for our own. A deep sense of lovingkindness and caring became a natural outgrowth and grew into a sense of interbeing and interconnectedness that we could trust as one little piece of what we sense and appreciate exists with all beings.”

We found that being able to explore and now even celebrate our differences and be accepted completely by the other person has given us each a taste of unconditional love. There is a sense of balance and wholeness in recognizing that we are our own best friend first, and that the other person is not there to do our work for us or to complete us.  I am very grateful to have this and other supportive friendships in my life.

So I invite you to take a moment now to call to mind someone in your life, a friend, family member or even a beloved pet, who has touched and supported you in your life. Feel the warmth of their presence around you now, as you breathe in and out, and allow yourself to bask in that warmth.  If you have any comments or friendship experiences you’d like to share, please do.

cheers,
Eliza